chapter one of the kingdom of anor chronicles

[erikut]

i have finaly made the first chapter of my story and its called Chapter One: In the Early Days
http://www.home.no/erikutt/ch1.html
this is altsto editet by will

if you missed my prouloge you can read it herehttp://www.home.no/erikutt/prolog.html

Erik

[jon_p]

Nice start there. It has all the essentials to a story; ledgend, fighting, death, fighting... well, its a good story.
Kinda reminded me of LOTR a bit. I hope you finish the next one soon so we can read it.

Jon.

[erikut]

hehe thanks i guess the second chafter vill be finished abot in a couple of moths.

and i almot forgot i have a new cam and the picture cuality is mocho better


erik

[Robin Hood]

Looking good. Can't wait for more. One thing though, I think you have too many caracters for the begining of a story. Its kinda hard to keep track of the people. Just my opinoun.

[Emperor James]

It is very nicely illustrated, the pictures really do their job. I do think that you should develop it all a little more slowly, but I am used to reading Charles Dickens, who is extremely slow at developing plots to the point of boredom, not to mention being the most negative writer I have ever read the works of Am I correct in the that the first chapter is kind of another prolougue?

[wlister]

I like the story, it is even better with some pictures. Erik had some great ideas and it was my pleasure to help him with his english.

Will

[st1920]

Really nice start, I hope that the next chapter will be ready soon.

[TheOrk]

Really great story, the plot is kinda like the one from the 60's movie WIZARDS.

[forester3291]

Very nice start. This story after some devoloping and better scenes(not that the scenes arn't great already) could(probably not for a while though) turn into a Chronicles of Ikros.

[DarkMage]

Sounds like an interesting story. I'm not too clear on why humans returned to the medieval style of living, but this story seems great anyhow. Keep up the good work. I'll keep an eye out for your next chapter.

[Bruce N H]

Hey Erikut,

Looks good. I particularly like the picture that's a bird's eye view looking down on the four warriors surrounded by attackers, and I'd like to see a better photo of the creature with the trans-orange wings.
One critique is that I would avoid using names that too closely remind of works by Tolkien or other fantasy writers (e.g. King Meduseld). That makes it seem more derivative.

Bruce

[erikut]

thank you evryone and bruce (Who now is Bruce Almygthy) i guess i change his name it was just temporary til i could figure out another name for him and ill be taking pics of Acopalypse the winged demon soon.

Erik