Here's my entry for the storytelling contest entitled The Graven Hawk:
The Graven Hawk
And here's a link to my brickshelf gallery (when moderated), which has all the full size pics from the story along with some extras:
Gallery
This is my first attempt at illustrating a short story, and I must say, it gave me newfound respect for all you guys who have huge story sites. The work you must have put into them makes them all the more impressive. Anyway, I had a blast doing this, and I hope you all enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed creating it. And please feel free to critique. Constructive criticism is always welcome.
The Graven Hawk-My entry for the stories contest
The Graven Hawk-My entry for the stories contest
[url=http://www.brickshelf.com/cgi-bin/gallery.cgi?m=koolhand77]My Brickshelf Gallery[/url]
[url=http://www.freewebs.com/msm1977/]The Graven Hawk[/url] a short story
[url=http://www.freewebs.com/msm1977/]The Graven Hawk[/url] a short story
- smcginnis
- Justiciar
- Posts: 1868
- Joined: Sun Feb 26, 2006 9:00 pm
- Location: Santa Rosa, California
- Contact:
I'm still reading it, but I can tell already that it's quite good. However, page 6 has the same text twice. I doubt that was intentional. Other than that, it's great so far!
~smcginnis
Edit: All right, I've finished it. I won't spoil it for someone else, but it's very good. And that micro castle should definitely be entered in Robin Hood's contest.
~smcginnis
~smcginnis
Edit: All right, I've finished it. I won't spoil it for someone else, but it's very good. And that micro castle should definitely be entered in Robin Hood's contest.
~smcginnis
Learning French.
Say it "ESS-MICK-GIN-ISS", with a hard "G", as in "get".
I'm a Pumpkin.
[url=http://www.freerice.com/]Free Rice[/url]
Say it "ESS-MICK-GIN-ISS", with a hard "G", as in "get".
I'm a Pumpkin.
[url=http://www.freerice.com/]Free Rice[/url]
Thanks for the heads up about the extra text smcginnis. I've fixed the problem. Thanks for the kind words too, I'm really glad you enjoyed the story.
[url=http://www.brickshelf.com/cgi-bin/gallery.cgi?m=koolhand77]My Brickshelf Gallery[/url]
[url=http://www.freewebs.com/msm1977/]The Graven Hawk[/url] a short story
[url=http://www.freewebs.com/msm1977/]The Graven Hawk[/url] a short story
- Maedhros
- Knight Templar
- Posts: 1885
- Joined: Mon Jul 18, 2005 8:22 pm
- Location: The dark forests of Sweden
- Contact:
Nice story there, Lonan! Cool to see a black protagonist as well... never seen that before in a LEGO story. The mood of the story was nice; it felt quite lighthearted but still serious when you came to those parts of the story.
A suggestion for future stories would be to improve the presentation of your MOCs though, either through more landscaping or photoshopped backgrounds. You still did well with simple methods though. It wasn´t at all bad, but it can always become better
A suggestion for future stories would be to improve the presentation of your MOCs though, either through more landscaping or photoshopped backgrounds. You still did well with simple methods though. It wasn´t at all bad, but it can always become better
Uhm.... Where was the micro castle?smcginnis wrote:And that micro castle should definitely be entered in Robin Hood's contest.
"Hinc satis elucet maiorem habere uim ad discenda ista liberam curiositatem quam meticulosam necessitatem.”
- Augustinus Hipponensis
- Augustinus Hipponensis
- smcginnis
- Justiciar
- Posts: 1868
- Joined: Sun Feb 26, 2006 9:00 pm
- Location: Santa Rosa, California
- Contact:
This pic:Maedhros wrote:Uhm.... Where was the micro castle?smcginnis wrote:And that micro castle should definitely be entered in Robin Hood's contest.
http://www.brickshelf.com/cgi-bin/gallery.cgi?i=2043447
~smcginnis
Learning French.
Say it "ESS-MICK-GIN-ISS", with a hard "G", as in "get".
I'm a Pumpkin.
[url=http://www.freerice.com/]Free Rice[/url]
Say it "ESS-MICK-GIN-ISS", with a hard "G", as in "get".
I'm a Pumpkin.
[url=http://www.freerice.com/]Free Rice[/url]
- Maedhros
- Knight Templar
- Posts: 1885
- Joined: Mon Jul 18, 2005 8:22 pm
- Location: The dark forests of Sweden
- Contact:
Ah, thanks for pointing that out.smcginnis wrote:This pic:Maedhros wrote:Uhm.... Where was the micro castle?smcginnis wrote:And that micro castle should definitely be entered in Robin Hood's contest.
http://www.brickshelf.com/cgi-bin/gallery.cgi?i=2043447
~smcginnis
"Hinc satis elucet maiorem habere uim ad discenda ista liberam curiositatem quam meticulosam necessitatem.”
- Augustinus Hipponensis
- Augustinus Hipponensis
That wasn't really a concious decision. In some current stuff I'm working on, Nith is an old man from a different continent, hence the dark skin. He's always telling very outlandish and incredible tales. I liked the character so much I thought he deserved his own story. Also, I think it's good to have some variety in the appearance of your characters. It helps people keep them straight.Maedhros wrote:Cool to see a black protagonist as well... never seen that before in a LEGO story.
Maedhros wrote:A suggestion for future stories would be to improve the presentation of your MOCs though
I agree with you guys about that. If there was one thing I was unhappy with it was the quality of the pictures. My camera's kind of hit or miss, especially with close-ups, and the black castle interior MOC was especially hard to photo. The lighter elements kept washing out in those pictures. I like pics photoshopped onto real backgrounds, like in your story, Maedhros. I'll have to try that for next time.ZIGGY! wrote:mocs though presentation could be better, maybe photoshop...
Anyway, I'm happy you guys enjoyed it.
[url=http://www.brickshelf.com/cgi-bin/gallery.cgi?m=koolhand77]My Brickshelf Gallery[/url]
[url=http://www.freewebs.com/msm1977/]The Graven Hawk[/url] a short story
[url=http://www.freewebs.com/msm1977/]The Graven Hawk[/url] a short story