A Short Story

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Prince Imdol
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A Short Story

Post by Prince Imdol »

This was an assignment for my English Class. I quite enjoyed it. We had to use many vivid images and actions with verbs. It had to be about a celebration as well. I sort of twisted it somewhat. Hope you like it!

Also, I am thinking of illustration this. Your thoughts on illustrations with legos?

A Black Celebration

Aroma's filled the air as women worked at their stove preparing a feast fit for a king. Ice capped waves rolled toward the shore of the small, dormant village preparing for the largest festival of the year. Open, lush fields rolled in the background with small children chasing each other around in the afternoon sunlit day.
'Such a waste,' thought a man gripping a long shaft standing at the turnpike.
"What is the point to all this hustling and bustling," he groaned lifting his pike as another horse drawn carriage passed by. A boy standing to his side, was also gripping a long pike; a sidearm sat in his side holster.

The turnpike was busy at this time of year, just after the harvest when food was piled high in stock houses and the merry was high. No one in town neglected this celebration, except Old Man Galvestone, the turnpike master. He sat meditating in his old house on the road, taking tolls from people, and bringing justice down upon those who opposed the law. He was an odd fellow, and took the opposet of all the views of the town. While most of the town enjoyed the large get together, he saw it as a vain useless get-together of old hags and tall war torn men.

"Why don't you like this festival?" asked the lone boy standing at Galvestone's side.
"There was a time," he began, "when I liked this festival and enjoyed it just like everyone else. I would pile my plate high was ripe fruits, and tender meats. I would run across the lush fields playing with those I thought I loved. I would go fishing in a small rowboat, and catch large pond fish, and then bring it back to cook it and eat it. I would spring my net over the glass water, and bring in the catch for everyone else. Then, I realized that this is not right, that I should stop immediatly, and never return to my old, vain ways. I knew the time would come when I must leave this village forever, and leave behind the people I loved. I must not bond with anyone here, for the time now grows near, and I must depart."
"Why."
"Because after tonight," he began again, "there will be nothing left of this village, and not a soul will live here agian."
"How could you say such a thing."
"We cannot deny the future truth, for it must happen."
"You speak lies old man."
"I do not speak lies, young one. But believe what you want. If you stay here tonight, you will join the fate of your comrades."
"Get away from me," yelled the boy, taking out his sidearm.
The man paused at this, but then, he let loose the grip on his long iron pike, and it fell to the soft grassy ground as a tower going to its fate.
"I will not fight you, but I will give you a choice. You can come with me and live, or you can die."

Six hours later

Screams filled the air. Teeth gnashed and men and women groaned. Houses were lit on fire, as tall hooded figures roamed the town. With their swords, they stabbed a man with a long rifle defending himself. They killed anyone who stood up to them, any who opposed them. Only two would survive that dark, red night.
Off in the water in a rowboat, to men sat watching the destruction.
A tear filled the eye of the younger one, as he watched.
The boat sat still deeper, creating ripples in the glass water.
"It has begun,"
This night, there would be no moon.


P.I
Thomas C.
"Sow a thought, reap an action;
Sow an action, reap a habit.
Sow a habit, reap a character.
Sow a character, reap a destiny"

"Don't let school interfere with your education."-Huckleberry Finn
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The Yeti
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Post by The Yeti »

Not bad at all, i would say. I was going to correct you on your overuse of modifiers, but i saw your guidelines...for that asignment, i would say "good show"...
Funny things DO happen--just never when you need them...
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Prince Imdol
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Post by Prince Imdol »

I prefer that type of writing to all others actually. I prefer to "show" what is going on instead of telling.


P.I
Thomas C.
"Sow a thought, reap an action;
Sow an action, reap a habit.
Sow a habit, reap a character.
Sow a character, reap a destiny"

"Don't let school interfere with your education."-Huckleberry Finn
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The Yeti
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Joined: Tue Feb 08, 2005 4:21 pm

Post by The Yeti »

If you like writing that style, than let nothing i said stop ya :wink: . I am no one to diss someone's style of writing...and as i said, it was a nice little peice. Keep writing, matey. You have talent 8)

Maaaannn... i come out of my comotose state and suddenly it's just "me and thee" posting here, eh? :wink:
Just kidding... 8)
Funny things DO happen--just never when you need them...
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Prince Imdol
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Post by Prince Imdol »

The more people the better.


I am wondering about illustrating this. Any thoughts on that?


P.I
Thomas C.
"Sow a thought, reap an action;
Sow an action, reap a habit.
Sow a habit, reap a character.
Sow a character, reap a destiny"

"Don't let school interfere with your education."-Huckleberry Finn
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The_Vanquished
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Post by The_Vanquished »

When I clicked on this thread, I had no idea what to expect. I was plesently suprised. I like the style, too, although I personally write very differently.
wrap me in a bolt of lightning,
send me on my way still smiling,
maybe that's the way i should go:
straight into the mouth of the unknown....
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Prince Imdol
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Post by Prince Imdol »

Thanks for you comments. I am glad you liked this story. I am proud of it.


P.I
Thomas C.
"Sow a thought, reap an action;
Sow an action, reap a habit.
Sow a habit, reap a character.
Sow a character, reap a destiny"

"Don't let school interfere with your education."-Huckleberry Finn
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